Thursday, March 24, 2011

Lessons of the Heart

Recently, the Matron learned that her mother is unwell. Heart explorations and surgeries are in store, along with other procedures. The Matron will be traveling to New Jersey to care for her mother as needed.

The failing heart was not lost on the Matron.

Here's how the heart works:

You hold that baby, one minute old and look into the face of eternal love. You're exhausted and spent, but the love means you can sprint the globe.

There's the wedding. Yes, gifts and receptions are good. But those minutes alone with someone who loves you beyond all else?

You're in college and a horrible series of events ensue. You call your best friend (thank you Sherri) and not only does she listen, but she shows up in about an hour to help you move out of your dorm room into a better place. Without asking.

Every tooth your child loses. The Tooth Fairy is love.


The day your 9 year old comes home with a question about what being White, Black or Asian means and wonders if he should feel guilt; he's confused because his family runs the racial gamut. The answer is no to guilt but understand history and current status. Not guilt, but resolution.

Your husband looks at you behind the backs of the arguing children and throws a kiss.

The 75 blood hound puppy throws himself on top of you at 5:30 am. The older dog, now six, is sound asleep.

Elizabeth Taylor. Let's just say she lived love. Good-bye, my dear.

Giving your father's eulogy. Just toss in an extra dollar with your tip and you'll be remembering someone the Matron loved.

Driving 3 hours a day to theaters, baseball, tennis, violin.

The end of the day . . . watching stupid late night TV and talking. Holding hands. Let's just say that 20 years is good. Please -- she knows this is sappy but it's true.

Making sure everyone does homework.

Watering the plants and tending to the garden.

Tucking everyone in at night.

This is the heart. Certainly, there's an organ that pumps blood and the Matron hopes hers -- and her mother's -- works hard for many years. But the heart? As metaphor and meaning in the world?

Watch the face of your child tonight.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Not Gone

Major life events. Hang in there. The Matron will be back. With frequent flyer miles under her Xanax belt. . . .

Monday, March 21, 2011


Matron to John: "OMIGOD! I saw 20 people I knew at the grocery store! It was like a party!"

John: "Twenty? Name them."

This is actually 20 years of marriage speaking, folks, but at the end of the post you won't believe a word.

Matron: "Okay -- Becky, Ned, Ali, Desiree, and Beth."

John: "That's five. Five is not twenty."

Matron: "But it felt like twenty. Can you give me that?"

John: "Yes, because it's you. But five is five, honey. We can both live with that and still celebrate your experience."

Matron: "Did you just say 'celebrate your experience'?

John: "Uh, yes. Unless that means I have to clean the bathroom on the third floor."

Matron: "Can we make a pact? I'm going to err to the side of hyperbole forever and ever. If I see five people, it's twenty. If I have a scratch, it's near-surgery. That's the way I operate and we'll both deal. You can sort out the truth on your own but I need to live my fantasy."

John: "Okay."

And friends? That okay? Made her love him more. Because then he just kissed her on the forehead and moved on.

Guess who saw FIFTY people at the grocery store today?